21 steps to becoming a
good Democrat
Virtually anyone can be a Democrat.
Just simply quit thinking and vote that way. If you want to be a
GOOD Democrat, however, there are some prerequisites you must have
first. Compare them below and see how you rate...
1. You have to believe the AIDS virus
is spread by a lack of Federal funding.
2. You have to believe that the same
school system that can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow
the best qualified to teach those same kids all about sex.
3. You have to believe that guns, in
the hands of law-abiding Americans, are more of a threat than U.S.
nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists
4. You have to believe that there was
no art before Federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global
temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in
the earth's climate, and more affected by Americans driving SUVs'!
6. You have to believe that gender
roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.
7. You have to be against capital
punishment but support abortion on demand.
8. You have to believe that
businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
9. You have to believe that hunters
don't care about nature, but loony activists from Seattle do.
10. You have to believe that
self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn
it.
11. You have to believe the U.S.
military, not evil, tyrannical regimes, start wars.
12. You have to believe the NRA is
bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while
the ACLU is good, because it supports certain parts of the
constitution.
13.. You have to believe that taxes
are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret
Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history
than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.
15. You have to believe that
standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are
not.
16. You have to believe Hillary
Clinton is all about "progress" and not power. She just wants to
help us out of the archaic system of governing that we've been
subjected to since our founding.
17. You have to believe that the only
reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because
the right people haven't been in charge.
18. You have to believe Republicans
telling the truth belong in jail, but a cheat, liar and sex offender
belongs in the White House and you would vote him back in there in a
New York minute (if you could).
19. You have to believe that
homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites and beastiality
should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas
should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal
Democrat Party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best
interest of the United States
21. You have to believe that the
vociferous minorities who protest against prayer and saluting the
flag in school, the 10 commandments in court, have far more rights
than the majority who believe in God and country and want these
values to be instilled in our young children
